Today’s guest post was written by Reshma McClintock . Reshma has a beautiful story to share as well as a documentary project that will bring her back to India to discover her cultural roots. Thank you Reshma for sharing your personal story in this post. I am excited to see what your Journey to India will bring, God Bless You!
Abandoned, Rescued: An Adoption Story of Love and a Need for Cultural Connection
While my story begins with abandonment, it unfolds much more beautifully…
I’ve been sharing my story for years and it’s about to change quite dramatically; I hope you’ll be a part of the change…
I was adopted by two incredible parents in 1980 after I was found abandoned in Calcutta, India. Initially, my parents were expecting to adopt an infant named Ruby but she died suddenly and I was sent in her place. I weighed a measly 7 pounds when I arrived in Portland, Oregon at 3 months old and there hasn’t been a day since that time in which I wasn’t loved and accepted.
While I had a happy, wonderful childhood I did often feel like “the brown one”. I didn’t match and I struggled with that. My family has always been extremely close knit and I never felt separated from them while in the comfort of our home but the outside world viewed our family much differently. I felt their stares everywhere we went. It would be impossible to recount each time my mom was asked to tell my story while in a grocery store, bank or at my school. Truthfully, it was a rare occasion that we went anywhere and my position in our family wasn’t questioned. Now, I understand people were curious and often had no ill-intentions when inquiring about me but, as a child, it isolated me and made me feel different and alone. It was the only time in which I felt any degree of distance from my family and, in those moments, the distance felt vast and insurmountable.
Being an adoptee is a wonderful and difficult thing. It’s wonderful because I find such beauty in the way I am wholly loved by my parents and brothers and difficult in that I haven’t had the luxury, yes luxury, of growing up with any extensive familiarity with my Indian culture.
Over the course of the past few years I’ve been working hard to familiarize myself with Calcutta in order to understand what life might have been like for me had I lived a life in India. I would venture to say that most adoptees have wonderings of what their life could have been. Wondering isn’t a bad thing rather it is natural and innate no matter how solid a family life one has been blessed with. Who I am cannot be minimized into how connected I am to my family or how loved I am by them. Our identity involves many layers; for an adoptee one of those layers is learning about the environment in which we were born into and the cultures associated with that environment. How can I know who I am without discovering more about that part of me? I cannot.
I’m going to be the subject of a documentary titled, Calcutta is My Mother. The link below will direct you to the films trailer and I ask that you would join me in making the documentary possible. I want to share my story so as to open the door for other adoptees to share theirs. The documentary will focus on me as I return to Calcutta for the first time in order to breathe in her customs so that I may better understand the country where I was born and the woman who gave me life.
Watch the documentary trailer here Calcutta is My Mother by Michael Hirtzel
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Reshma McClintock for Adoption Mama
Reshma lives in Denver, Colorado with her husband and daughter. She currently writes about her life and feelings surrounding being an adoptee on her website Written By Resh and is working on a book about her experience with adoption.